My Perspective
I approach this work from a developmental perspective focused on fit, momentum, and the conditions that allow growth to continue.
Many of the students and young adults I work with are not lacking ability or effort. They are navigating a mismatch between how they learn, focus, and regulate, and the environments and expectations they are asked to meet.
These are often individuals who appear capable, but are quietly losing momentum.
When this mismatch persists, progress slows. Over time, momentum can stall entirely.
From Recognition to Collapse: A Developmental Continuum
The students who struggle quietly do not disappear when they leave school. Their experience evolves.
In The Inbetweeners, I focus on a group of neurodivergent students whose distress often remains invisible, not because they are thriving, but because they are holding it together just well enough to avoid detection. These students adapt within structured environments, often for years, until the cost of that adaptation becomes unsustainable.
A companion volume, The In-Between Years, extends this work into early adulthood, examining what happens when these same individuals leave structured environments and begin to struggle with initiation, follow-through, and sustained momentum.
What was once hidden becomes more visible, but often more confusing.
These are individuals who were once described as capable, yet now appear stuck, avoidant, or unable to move forward. Without the structure that once supported them, even imperfectly, the mismatch between expectation and capacity becomes harder to navigate.
A Pattern Across Development
Together, these experiences reflect a developmental sequence:
- Early phase: distress is present but largely invisible
- Transitional phase: adaptation begins to break down
- Later phase: momentum slows, stalls, or collapses
Understanding this progression allows families and professionals to recognize patterns earlier, respond more effectively, and support development before challenges become more entrenched.
Fit, Not Pressure
Many interventions focus on increasing effort, accountability, or structure.
While well-intended, these approaches can unintentionally intensify the problem when the underlying issue is mismatch.
When expectations are better aligned with how a person learns, focuses, and regulates, something shifts. Motivation returns. Capacity becomes visible again. And forward movement resumes.
Closing
This sequence also reflects how my perspective on development has evolved over time.
This perspective is shaped both by lived experience and by years of clinical and educational work.
You can read more about how this understanding developed in my story.